Once Upon A Time

Remarks at the funeral of Annie Laurie Pomeranz by daughter Laurie Pomeranz Grimm, August 11, 2007

“Once upon a time…” well that’s how the card starts. It was just one card of many, many we have found in the piles of cards that mom has kept over the years. Sarah had sent it to her for Mother’s Day in 1990 and while the inside sentiment says “don’t you just love fairy tales?” I believe that most of what the card says is true…I’ll let you decide for yourself which is or isn’t the fairy tale (feel free to laugh).

“Once upon a time, there was very wonderful mother who lived in a little village outside the city. She had a perfect marriage and perfect children and because her family was perfect, she never had to nag them about leaving their socks under the sofa or anything. Because she was such a lovely person she had scores of friends who loved her very much. She was an inspiration to all who knew her because she never complained and always had a cheerful word for anyone she came in contact with.”

The card goes on to say something about winning the lottery but since we know that would really never happen I wont include it. We had a great time reading this to mom and she seemed to enjoy it.

Another card we came across holds some fun memories from just the Friday before mom passed away. She had called us all to her room. Upon gathering we began to banter back and forth with each other until mom raised her finger and said “don’t be sarcastic” (still the same old mom). She then proceeded to tell us to be nice to each other and that she loved everybody. After a few minutes she said “if I had a million dollars”. She didn’t finish her thought but I knew from some previous conversation that if she had a million dollars she would ask medical science to find out what was wrong with her. We all know that the only thing wrong with mom was that she was just plain tired and had told several of us many times in the last six months that what she really wanted to do was get to the couch, any couch, and take a nice long nap. But mom’s sentence of “if I had a million dollars” quickly led to more joking about where it was hidden and who would actually get it. I wont share that with you now but suffice to say we all have great reasons to be the sole recipient of said millions. On Sunday afternoon, while reading more from the card pile I pulled out a great Valentine card that Suzanne had sent her years ago. On the front was a cartoon drawing of a million dollar bill labeled “one million smackeroos” and the inside said “You’re one in a million”. We immediately told mom that we had find the illusive million dollars and laid the card next to her on the bed so we wouldn’t forget.

Ten years ago when I got the phone call that dad had died I stayed up half the night writing a tribute letter to him. It contained the things that all of us had wanted to say but may or may not have ever said to dad. From that I learned my lesson to always say what I wanted to say to mom…good, bad or indifferent…so that she could hear my thoughts and my heart. For her birthday this past January I sent her a card that, for once, finally said all the things I had trouble saying in previous conversations and none of the extra stuff that I didn’t want to say. On the front is a small wallet card with these words

“Mom, no matter what I do today or where the future takes me tomorrow, I promise to remember all the things you’ve taught me and how very much you love me. And in case I don’t always say it and sometimes I forget to show it, I wanted you to have to have this so you know I love you, too, mom.”

I will leave you with these words from the inside of the card,

“Thank you, mom, for being someone I’ve always been able to turn to for acceptance, reassurance and love - someone who taught me values that will last a lifetime, someone who keeps growing dearer to me all the time…Thanks you, mom, for filing my life with so much love. No matter where I am, you will always be a part of me - in thought, in heart, in love.